Questioning

Do I base my opinion on what other people think?
Do I allow what they say into my heart to sink?

Is my merit based on work? Is my life based on fame?
If it is, wow, that would be such a shame.

Useless as a severed limb lying on the floor.
Doubting, seeking, asking what am I really here for?

Oh God instill in me a passion and a zest,
for this life you have given me, I truly am well blessed.

I think I have a listening ear.
Am I trusting you? Will I persevere?

Your plan I feel so strong one day
can nearly be swayed by one another day.

Yet here I am waiting for you please
confirm what I should do.

In that waiting let me wait
with patience, kindness, that is how I will pray it.

Where am I God? I can’t see where?
I look into the mirror and I stare.

Who are you there before me?
A woman waiting to be what I should be.

I long for solace in my heart,
Lord start today, please help me start.

To be motivated in all I do.
To work my guts out just for You.

On the roller coaster, its up and down.
Once a smile now a frown.

The fear that follows bind it up
Lord fill me up,please fill my cup.

My heart hurts and aches so.
Let your peace upon me flow.

Deepest water rushing in
cleansing me from hurt and sin.

Let your truth be evident
Let your peace be prevalent.

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Beautiful Mosaic Art

Beautiful Mosaic Art

By Tara Young

Stepping out of the darkness the grief is nearly gone. The ache of loss and sorrow, your mercy now upon me shon.

You are the healing hand that wiped away my tears. You sent a wonderful family that took away the fears.

That childless I would always be. Alone with no children to love. Just like that day many years ago when You gave me a precious dove.

You answered my prayer and gave me a child not one, but two, then three.  You blessed me tremendously yet sometimes it is hard to see.

There are some days the grief rolls in and nearly drowns my heart. Then I cry and remember my life is a piece of beautiful, mosaic art.

A miraculous family tree.

Beneath my heart where my womb would be, is an empty space.

 No child, no babe, no wee one, will ever inhabit that place.

 I am unable to bear a child, a lament my heart did face.

 In God’s arrangement and in His manner He provided by His grace.

 He took my three and replaced with theirs, three little ones in need.

I recognize that He has blessed me with richness indeed.

He grew them in another’s womb another mother did bear.

 My valued cherished daughters to me you gave to care.

Three little faces greet me each new day.

Wild and passionate in their extraordinary way.

 Their joy replaces my grief.

I thought that through birth they would come to me but adoption was a relief.

 I understand though no babes will come I do unmistakably see.

You enriched our lives by planting a miraculous family tree.