The Shades of Disarray

The Shades of Disarray

By Tara Young

Many shades of disarray I can plainly see.

Why can’t my home be as tidy as I wish it to be?

The hours we read and played today. The laundry piled up high.

To say that I am not discouraged would be a great big lie.

Yet in her eyes I see a glow as first words she read out loud.

Her voice squeaked and screeched as she yelled, “I read! Mom! Aren’t you proud?”

These moments that I have with her are shades of disarray.

The cleaning and the folding will be done as I pray.

Pray that I am worthy of this child placed in my heart.

For in my womb she did not grow, but God gave her a fresh start.

So when I see the disarray, I shrug my shoulders and sigh.

I will get to that, but now, her joy is nigh.

If I wait until she naps, a lot more things get done.

Right now in my shades of disarray, she just wants to have some fun.

 

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Fly Paper Mama

Are there times when in the distance, you hear someone calling your name? Are you actually listening?  Do you care?

Then you realize the person is right next to you, repeating your name and calling you. “MOM! MOM! MOM! Can you hear me? I am talking to you. MOM?!”. Is there a frustration that builds as they pull you from your own blissful world of silence?

Being a stay at home mom can be a challenge at times. There is a constant barrage of questions and answers that trickle in through the calm. Constant redirection and correction are your tools. Little rears, little noses and little hands that all need attention NOW!

Little lips are kissing my arm like one of those water pecking birds.

I am in the midst of doing some chore. The other two are speaking as they increase the decibel level by 10 so that they can be louder than the other to get my attention. The garden needs to be watered. Five piles of semi folded laundry are scattered in the living room. Dinner is in the oven and the dishwasher is in over drive.

Then someone announces, “The dog just rolled in horse poo mom and she wants to come in!”  

“NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! DON’T LET HER IN!!!”

“Hi Angel.” (In a very gushy talking to the dog voice. Those who have dogs, know what I am talking about!)

“OUT! OUT! OUT!”

“Mom, she wanted to say hi.”

“She can say hi from the door next time.”

(True story) 🙂

Do you feel like you just can’t listen anymore because you are so frustrated with life going on all around you?

Do you feel like Fly Paper?

Turn this situation around to yourself.  Imagine you are with a friend or a spouse having lunch or a coffee.  You are chatting away only to realize they did not hear a word you said.  Shock and dismay are pretty common reactions here. Feeling unimportant to them is another.

I really like to speak and be heard. I really like to listen. I have to remember though, that even though my children are little, they are still little people. They do need to be heard. I am training them by my actions and reactions how to be adult listeners.

Am I showing them that is ok not to listen while someone is speaking to them?

OR

Am I making them feel special, because I am taking time from my busy day to demonstrate the same love that I want to be showered with?

There is a great responsibility before us as we raise children to be good listeners.

Lend your ear today.  Listen to what the little people are saying. 🙂

 

Lord, let me be a good example to my children today. Guide me as I teach and instruct them in Your ways. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

 ^{James 1:19-20 NIV “}My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, ²⁰ because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”

You are the One

You are the One
By: Tara Young

You are my King and my Lord
Gracious forevermore.
You are the one
You are the one.

You the Savior, Son of the King
You are the One
You are the One

I lift my voice to You
You are all that’s good and true.
You are the One
You are the One

My heart cries out to you
You are deliverer too
You are the One
You are the One

Finding solace there
You’ve counted each and every hair
You are the One
You are the One

For every tear I’ve cried
for every lie I’ve lied.
You are the One
Yes, You are the One.

You are the beginning and the end
Alpha Omega without sin
You are the One
Oh, You are the One.

Lord You are the One
Yes, You are the One

Creator of everything
Life giving Holy God
You are the One
Yes, You are the One

Joy giving, heart healer
Mind blowing love revealer
You are the One
Yes You are the One

Jesus your mighty hand
Delivers me from sinking sand
You are the One
You are the One

Soiled and forgiven dove.
I am one You dearly love
You are the One
You are the One

God my heart you mend
When my clothes I have rend
You are the One
You are the One

Peace washes over me
Giving me hope in Your great mercy.
You are the One
Yes You are the One

Gladness unleashed
My life restored
You are the One
You are the One

You are my love
The One I adore
You are the One
You are the One

Love spilling out my heart is full
You’re so awesome. I am Your jewel.
You are the One
Yes, You are the One

Gentle correction or gettin’ knocked on your rear?

Do you ever get that gentle correction from the Lord? Or do you just get that earth-shaking wake up call that knocks you on your rear letting you know you are being disobedient.  God uses whatever He chooses. It is not always a disobedience that He is correcting, but it may be that I am not spending enough time in the Word so He can speak to me. Sometimes He uses those, “AHA!” moments. Sometimes He does use illness. Sometimes He uses other people to let me know that I am falling short.  Sometimes He speaks directly to my heart.   This is what I got today…

Not in these words exactly but the Lord impressed this on my heart. “Tara, you sure are sick.  In the last month you have been in severe pain with a ruptured ovarian cyst and you now have the flu.  I am trying to get your attention here.”  “Yes Lord! I am listening.” As I lay on my bed He truly spoke to my heart and said, “I miss you dear one. Where have you been? You don’t even know where your bible is do you?”  UUUUUMMM well since you can’t lie to God, I said, “No, Lord I sure don’t! I am so sorry, please forgive me.

Wonderfully forgiven I sit here typing.  Then He let me know that I need to write about this. So here it is.  It doesn’t matter what situation you are in always make time for God. While you are on your back hacking up a lung, spend some time in prayer.

When needy children who are clawing and pawing at you surround you, read them a verse from the Bible.  (Not the rain down fire and brimstone people!) Pray a blessing of peace over them.  God’s word never returns void as it says in Isaiah 55:11 NLT “It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.”

God has been trying to get my attention. It seems rather painful right now, but it could have been worse.  The CT scan shows no more cysts. My flu will eventually go away.  My husband and dad have been super heroes helping me.

God provides.

He never leaves us. He is, He was and Always will be. He is the provider. He is the Rock. He is everything to me.  He heals all my ills, affords me with great care. He never leaves me with a burden I can’t bear.  I am never alone. He is always near. He will never stop bending to me His listening ear. Unfaithful am I to share this truth.  May I be more like your beloved Ruth.

Forsooth. Gotta love that word!!! I wanted to use it in my poem, but, was unable to. I Used it in a random sentence.  🙂

Any way. Listen to the Lord He is pretty awesome!

Take a breath. Pray. Be a peacemaker.

Instead of yelling, I have prayed. Instead of letting my kids fight, we have prayed. Instead of letting frustrations get the best of us, we have prayed. Amazing what prayer can do! Amazing how many times we are praying instead of reacting too! “A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” Proverbs 15:1 NLT
“A prayer of one overwhelmed with trouble, pouring out problems before the L LORD, hear my prayer! Listen to my plea!”  Psalm 102:1 NLT
“He will listen to the prayers of the destitute. He will not reject their pleas.”  Psalm 102:17 nlt

In this tumultuous time of change, my temper has flared quite a lot.  My husband is so wise. He said, “Stop and pray before you react.”  I know this fact. I believe that the Lord answers prayer. Yet my sinful life overwhelms the truth.

I have to stop and pray so that I teach my children to do what is right instead of overreacting because of my circumstances.

Take a breath.  Pray.  Be a peacemaker.

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.”  Matthew 5:9

The “J” word

J Word

Tucking the kiddos in the evenings is a wonderful time of day for me.  They are stalling because they don’t want to go to bed. So they grasp at straws to stay up even though it is a good 1-2 hours past their bedtime.  Some pretty funny stuff gets said as they are being tightly tucked away for the night.

As I tucked them into bed this evening, my eldest said, “Mom, is the ‘J’ word a bad word?” I am thinking about which word it could be so instead of saying the word, she stutter sounds it out. Jjjj  eeee  rrrr kkkk.  I said, “Well dear, I don’t want you to call your sisters that word. ” She responded in complete sincerity, “Well if I am driving in traffic and someone cuts me off can I call them that?”  I let her know that since she is only 10 she didn’t have to worry about people cutting her off  while she was driving and we should be careful with what words come out of our mouths.

Yes, the word  JERK has come out of my mouth before and no it isn’t really a bad word, but name calling isn’t necessary!

Psalm 19:14  (KJV) talks about our words being pleasing to God. This is what we should consider as we have a captive audience. 🙂

“Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.”

Our kiddos see what we do and repeat what we say. YIKES! 🙂

Lord, please help us to use our words wisely and our thoughts, even though they are hidden, may they bring glory to You.

In the name of Jesus we pray. Amen!

Can’t seem to see the other side

Are there days you wake up and can’t see past the fence? You know something is there, but ya just can’t seem to see to the other side. Life is like that. We often want to see past the fence but it isn’t time. We aren’t ready to see tomorrow. That is why it is there and not here! 🙂  Just like this picture. You see the fence, but you see a blur behind. Don’t worry about tomorrow! Think about today.  Make it through each second, each minute, and then each hour. God has your back! 

                                                    Tomorrow is coming.

Matthew 6:25-34 NLT

25“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing?

26Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are?

27Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

28“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing,

29yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are.

30And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

31“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.

 33Seek the Kingdom of God^d above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

34“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

The tower.

My 3-year-old was building with some little tykes blocks and was very frustrated because they would not stand up and stay put where she placed them.  Frustration turned to anger until finally she just gave a huge “ARRRG” and started throwing them back in the box muttering unintelligible 3-year-old ramblings.  I tried helping her strengthen the base so they wouldn’t fall so quickly. I showed her some different ways to make it work.  She tore down each attempt of mine to do her own and she forcefully told me “NO! I will do it myself!” I allowed her to do just that. There were many attempts and toppled towers but in the end, she had to make a choice based on my help or her own. She finally came to lay it down on the floor and attach them all instead of trying to make them all stand up.

Aren’t we that way with God?  We hear our friends sharing their life wisdom with us, but do we really listen?  Do we listen as they share about their past mistakes? Do we try to learn from their mistakes so we don’t have to suffer unnecessarily?  Do we grab our lives back and say we won’t listen to their advice.

  God sends godly people into our lives to help us. God also speaks to us through His word.  He is trying to help us!  We can choose to follow God and build the sort of “tower” He wants us to or we can try, and fail in our own strength to build a tower that won’t stand up under any pressure.  Are you letting God build your tower?  Am I?  Yield your life to Him and He will create something beautiful in you and through you. Let God show you His wisdom and give Him back the blue prints of your tower.

Proverbs 24:3-6 (MSG)

 ^3-4 It takes wisdom to build a house, and understanding to set it on a firm foundation;
It takes knowledge to furnish its rooms with fine furniture and beautiful draperies.

 ^5-6 It’s better to be wise than strong; intelligence outranks muscle any day.
Strategic planning is the key to warfare; to win, you need a lot of good counsel.

In Your way.

Friendship thought solid, masks pulled away, yet they apparently judged what they saw.

 Feelings are trampled, trust is broken, and how do we walk this jagged road?

 Not even goodbye not sure we were leaving, yet the emptiness still overwhelms my heart.

 Emotions billowing, sorrows they’re reeling. Why can’t I shake these feelings God?

 Anger, frustration tides rolling in what’s the source of my restlessness?

 Change has come Lord it’s hard to process. What is your plan for us now we ask?

 Knowing the answers will make it better right? Why did it happen this way dear God?

 Yes God we know it was not meant for us and all things work together for your good.

 Seeking, searching, following hard after you is what we are assiduously trying to do.

 Trying to be authentic trying to be strong, why does this feel so heartrending and wrong?

 Trying to rest in your promise Father. Your love over flows let me seize it today.

 My cup is before You, fill it dear Father. Help me to relax in Your will this day.

 My broken heart, I acquiesce to you now God, I’m your servant help me to march in Your way.

It trikles down.

Grumbling, mumbling, rumbling and complaining it starts at the top and just trickles down.

Justifying, excusing, anger is confusing. When will I see it’s me who needs change?

Today is the day dear Lord and I need You. Come to my aid and help me right now.

Loving and gentle, patience and kindness. Now I see that trickling down.

Washing, refreshing, cleansing, encouraging. Allowing them each to be whom you made them for You.

They’re not little robots, the children adopted. All things before are out of my control.

What happens today though, I am responsible. What I do will flood their lives.

May I be the light in their shadowy darkness. Help me in my repaired state just guide them to You.

Show mercy, love, kindness and bind up their wounds Lord. Help me to be the mom you’ve made me to be.

I do have a purpose but am I allowing you to fill me and use me today?

We are your creations; you’ve made us to worship. May we be your vessels let Your peace trickle down.